i will always miss june. i take pride in that month. i love that it loves me.

but hey, it's july, yet another month closer to the light at the end of the tunnel. i can almost smell the christmas bells.

what might make my christmas complete:

1) ashlee simpson's bittersweet world

2) speed racer manga box set

3) speed racer mach 5 model

4) coldplay's viva la vida

5) a new nose

probably in that order- because im not too sure about number 5.

these past two weekends have been quiet. i kept last night free thinking that i could sleep and wake up early for brunch this morning, but nobody seems keen on going out anymore. eastern promises became empty promises. yeah, i shouldn't bother myself over this.

i recently sent some of my favourite photos for printing, and pimped up my office cubicle with the lovely snapshots. i feel so much happier just looking at them, knowing that perhaps, just perhaps, i still have a life beyond my nondescript existence. i still have people worth breathing for.

met up with vanessa the other day. it's been way too long, and i was surprised how we could talk like all those years in between didn't happen. things like that make me smile. it's always the little things, you know, so constant and so kind. reminds me of that night of deception (are you free tonight?), with alan junyi and zee. the movie was nonsense, but chilling at coffee bean more than made up for it. i think it made me realize, although ive probably realized it before, that what we have is good. even despite all the things we could possibly gripe about, i suppose i wouldn't exchange my life thus far for anything else. this is the stable me speaking. on other days you know i'd be a hollywood actor anytime. i'd be on my world tour. i'd be physically abusing the paparazzi. i would have no time for friends, only socialites. my family will be my publicity.

but then, like holden, i would start to miss it all. for that was when i ruled the world.

8:28 PM